Birth Story of Bryce Lyn Spear

The birth of Bryce Lyn Spear was one of the most amazing and hardest times of my life. There was a lot of preparation that went into it but the most important moment during my entire pregnancy was when I was 5 months along and we decided to go to a free standing birth center and avoid a hospital birth completely. That was the best decision I have ever made. That started my journey of having a natural childbirth and I became obsessed in gaining as much knowledge as I could about midwifery and natural childbirth. Along the way I stumbled across a home course called Hypnobabies, which teaches you self-hypnosis and how to relax and manage pain during labor and childbirth. I studied that and listened to hypnosis tracks everyday during the last 3 months of my pregnancy. I truly believe that I would not have been able to do what I did without the help of Hypnobabies. It is an amazing tool and really works!
Looking back I am pretty sure that my labor began with Bryce Christmas night. I had been having Braxton Hicks contractions for weeks prior to that so I didn’t really think much of them, but that night they started to get to be a little more difficult to deal with but they were still very manageable. I went to bed and woke up at 3AM (Dec. 26th) to go to the bathroom and discovered that I had quite a bit of blood and mucus. I became very excited because I knew that this was the beginning of things really starting. I suppressed my urge to wake up Brendon and went back to bed because I knew that it could also be another 2 -3 days as well. I got a few more hours of sleep but if I would have known what I know now I would have tried to sleep most of that day!! Things picked up a bit in the afternoon and my contractions started becoming a little stronger but they were still not forming any kind of pattern and were easily dealt with. That went on for the remainder of the day with a couple hours here and there where they almost completely stopped. I was getting a bit frustrated because I had read that labor like that could go on for days. I did not want to deal with that at all so I sat and bounced on my birth ball a lot, hula hooped on the Wii for a little while (had heard that works!) and we all went for a long walk to try and get things going. All of the above helped and that night I started having regular contractions!
Brendon and Brenna went to bed around 11pm and I was going to join them after getting a few things done around the house but my body had other plans. As soon as I lay down in bed I had a contraction that was a lot stronger then I had been dealing with and decided right then and there that I was probably not going to sleep that night. I was right. Every time I tried to lie down, or even sit, it would make my contractions ten times stronger. I spent all night pacing the house, cleaning and timing contractions. It was rather peaceful spending that time alone and I really enjoyed it. I snacked and listened to my music playlist I had put together a few days before as well as some Hypnobabies tracks. When Brendon woke up at 7am he was surprised that I had been up all night and decided to call off work that day.
We spent the entire day (Dec. 27th) timing contractions as well as trying to keep ourselves occupied by playing games and packing last minute things. I finally called the midwife that afternoon to let her know that my contractions were about 10 – 7 minutes apart. She told us to continue to stay at home and to call when they became about 5 minutes apart. As evening came I was having a harder time dealing with the intensity and they were becoming a lot closer. I tried the hypnosis a few times but was not very successful with it at that time. Around 7pm I sat down and Brendon started reading scripts to me from the Hypnobabies book and it was working!! I was able to sit down for the first time that day, put myself into hypnosis (with the help of Brendon’s cue words) during contractions and relax so much that Brendon said it looked like I was sleeping. I will never forget that time sitting there with Brendon and Brenna – I wish it would have lasted longer. Brenna was sitting there holding my hand and during each contraction Brendon was reading scripts and I was so relaxed and in a very peaceful state. It was one of my favorite times during the entire labor. After I was able to relax, things started to pick up more and my contractions were anywhere from 6 -3 minutes apart. Around 9pm Brendon called the midwife and she said to come in so I could be checked. We called my Mom to come get us (she was there in 3 minutes!!), got things together and left the house. The drive was horrendous but Brendon continued to read me scripts and put me into hypnosis with each contraction. I started to feel very nauseous in the car and remember thinking that was a good sign. We arrived at the birth center in about 20 minutes and I went inside and met Heather, the midwife. She checked me and I was 5 cm dilated so off we went to the birth house. The birth houses are like little apartments. The one that I had picked prior to the birth had a huge tub in the middle of one of the rooms and my plan was to have a water birth. It had a padded bench on all three sides that could probably seat about 10 people. There was a little kitchenette and two bedrooms. Brenna claimed the bedroom in the back with the kitchenette in it and set up her DVD player as well as all her drawing stuff. We had brought a plethora of food and drinks too.
I continued to labor all night at the birth house and it became so intense I thought for sure I was in transition and that we would have a baby that night (which happened to be my brother’s birthday!). I threw up a few times and had body shakes, which are all signs of the last and most intense part of labor. Heather checked me and I had progressed to 7 cm and I remember being excited but wishing the last 3 cm would go by quickly. That wasn’t the case at all. I spent some time in the tub hoping that would speed things up. I spent some time pacing, on the birth ball, walking outside. Again, I got no sleep for the second night in a row. Brendon and my Mom were so wonderful and took turns reading me scripts all night and into the next day. My Mom also took Brenna outside for walks and helped with her so much. Brenna did so great and held my hand a lot and seemed to be handling things very well. I had talked to her a bunch before so she knew what to expect. The Hypnobabies was keeping me very calm though so I think that helped. There were a few times that I was pretty close to losing it but Brendon helped get me back on track. I really could not have done what I did without Brendon. He was my rock and thinking about what he did for me and went through for me brings tears to my eyes. He calmed me so much that when he would leave the room I would almost immediately have a contraction that would almost send me over the edge. In fact, we began joking about it and anytime the nurse was checking Bryce’s heart rate (which was about every 30 minutes) we would make Brendon leave the room so that I would have a contraction and sure enough it always worked. He did tell me after everything was over that he never wants to see or read another Hypnobabies script for the rest of his life!! I don’t blame him.
The morning of the 28th Heather came and checked me again and I was still 7 cm dilated. At this point I had been in labor for over 48 hours and I was trying to figure out what was keeping me from dilating. All of the midwife books I had read said that the mind has so much to do with birthing and I was starting to think that something in my mind, some kind of fear, was stalling my labor. We would soon find out that wasn’t the case at all and that there was other stuff going on.
As the day went on I got in the tub a couple times and continued to do things to try and get everything moving. Heather suggested a few things, which I very willingly tried, and my contractions were staying very strong and very regular. At 3pm that afternoon she checked me again and I was still at a 7. She talked to me about breaking my water to try and get things moving and I agreed. As I was laying on the bed getting my bag of water broken, Heather told me that she couldn’t believe how well I was doing through all of this and how I wasn’t letting anything discourage me and that I was staying so positive even though things were not going well. She said most people wouldn’t deal with it as well as I was. I told her that there was really nothing I could do about any of it and that I was just going with the flow. Later I told Brendon that there really was never a time that I had any negative thoughts or thought that I couldn’t do this. I wasn’t thinking about things that had happened earlier that day and I wasn’t really concentrating on what was GOING to happen. I was completely in the present, taking things as they came and dealing with each minute and each contraction. I remember not even being worried that I had stayed at a 7 for so long. I had complete faith in what was supposed to happen and I knew that everything would be okay. Brendon told me after the fact that he was so worried about me because I had not had any sleep in about 50 hours and that I still had the delivery to go thru. He voiced his concern to Heather (I didn’t know that at the time) and Heather reassured him and told him that she could tell I had some fight left in me. My Mom was also very worried but I didn’t know that until later. I’m very glad that nobody voiced their concerns to me. That may have put me in a different mind frame.
After Heather broke my water she left and I continued to lie in bed for a few minutes. I started to shake uncontrollably and felt nauseous again. My Mom grabbed a trash bag and I threw up several times. My contractions instantly became ten times stronger and I could really tell that I didn’t have that water there anymore to cushion everything. Brendon and my Mom continued to take turns reading scripts as I paced the birth house, going from room to room. With every contraction I would say “Read!!” and throw my arms around Brendon’s neck and moan and breath or lean on the counter at the kitchenette. It was so intense and those last few hours are somewhat of a blur. Cindy, the nurse that stayed with me, suggested I get in the tub and I thought that would maybe help relieve some of the pain I was having. At some point she or my Mom must have lit the candles around the tub and turned the lights off. As soon as I lay down in the tub I had a contraction that was so powerful and I knew that I was officially in the transition stage of labor and that I would definitely have a baby soon and that I wasn’t getting out of that tub until I did. Brendon found a script in the Hypnobabies book that was specifically for transition and started reading that to me and putting his hand on my forehead and used the “Relax” cue to help put me into hypnosis. I still cannot believe how good that worked – it was amazing!! I was in the tub, having the worst pain of my life and to everyone else it looked like I was in a very peaceful state. I remember Brendon asking me at one point if I was still having contractions and I told him that yes, it felt like my insides were being ripped out. He said it looked like I was sleeping. I know that pain would have been a hundred times worse had it not been for my hypnosis.
While I was relaxed and Brendon was reading the script my body suddenly sat up and I was involuntarily pushing. I remember yelling, “I’m pushing!” and Cindy, the nurse, called Heather to tell her. After a few contractions and a few pushes Heather came in along with about 4 other women from the birth center. She checked me and I was completely dilated – what a wonderful thing to hear!!! They were all so calm and let me do my thing for a while. Heather suggested that I get on my knees and lean over the side of the tub with my back facing her. At the time I had no idea how long I had been pushing for (I ended up pushing for an hour and a half). I was starting to feel exhausted and feel like I couldn’t push anymore. I didn’t have anything left in me. With every contraction I pushed only once and thought that I was never going to get this baby out of me. I remember hearing Heather and another woman behind me quietly coaching me and encouraging me to keep going and to push one more time. Brendon later told me that at one point he looked up and saw all the women, nurses and midwife behind me with such calm and peaceful looks on their faces, just being so patient and quiet. He said that he’ll never forget that moment. I remember reaching down when Heather told me to feel her head crowning. That gave me a little recharge and I started to push with everything I had and then some. I think feeling the progress helped tremendously as well as hearing the women being so positive and talking so quietly and calmly to me. Brenna and Brendon were at my head almost the entire time, holding my hand and giving me encouraging words as well. My Mom was standing off to the side, taking pictures. I was absolutely terrified of tearing and thinking back I think that hurt my pushing a bit and that’s why I wasn’t giving it my all. I was trying to be very careful about letting myself stretch and not having her come out too fast. I remember asking Heather a couple times if I was tearing when I started feeling the burning sensation but she kept telling me no so I kept pushing as hard as I could. When her head came out it was such a relief! And when her body came out it was the best feeling in the world! I turned around and Heather had Bryce in her hands trying to get her cord unwrapped. It was an unbelievable sight!! Bryce had her cord around her neck, under both armpits, around her back and around one of her legs. No wonder I wasn’t dilating – she wasn’t able to come down on my cervix until my water was broke!! Heather had to immediately cut the cord because she could not figure out how to get it unwrapped. I was a little disappointed because we weren’t able to wait until the cord stopped pulsing and do skin to skin but there were more important things to be done at the time. Brendon did tell me that Heather had cut the cord as close to the placenta as possible and that she milked the blood from the cord back into Bryce. I thought that was such an awesome thing to do for my baby and no doctor would ever do anything like that. I remember right after Bryce was born, looking around for Brenna and asking where she was. She had missed the birth because she went back to the bedroom. Later she told me it got a little too intense for her (I guess I was being pretty vocal at the end). She did come out right after and saw Bryce. I remember her coming over to me and she had tears in her eyes, telling me how cute she was. I will never forget the look on her face.
As soon as Bryce was detached from me they took her to the warmer and had to give her oxygen and work on her a bit. I remember asking if she was, in fact, a girl and was told yes. She was having a bit of a hard time breathing but they kept reassuring me that she was okay. Brendon looked worried and kept an eye on her. After the fact he told me that he was very overwhelmed and was worried about me and all the blood and Bryce and her breathing problems. I remember seeing my Mom too but some of it is a bit of a blur. My Dad showed up at some point and I remember being happy that he was there. I stayed in the tub for a few minutes. There was so much blood in the water that I couldn’t even see my body. I remember asking if that was normal and being worried but I was told everything was okay. I stood up with some help and delivered the placenta very quickly. Come to find out, I bled so much because when Bryce was born the cord was so short from being tangled up on her that it pulled my placenta and made it detach. I made it over to the bed and Heather came and checked on me. I asked her how badly I tore and cringed, waiting for the answer. She told me that I had a small 1st degree tear and I wasn’t even going to need stitches! I was shocked and so happy!! My worst fear had not come true and I was so relieved. After hearing the good news we were all told that Bryce was a whopping 10 pounds and 1 ounce! I think Brenna was the one who said good job Mom and started clapping and everyone joined in. I still cannot believe that I gave birth to a 10 pound baby without so much as a stitch. Wow.
When they were finished working on Bryce they finally brought her over to me and I put her on my bare chest and covered her with a blanket. Her breathing became normal and she almost instantly pinked right up. I checked her out and she was so perfect and so cute and so chubby. Brenna and Brendon came over and Mom took our first family picture. I nursed her right away and she latched on like a pro. After cuddling her for a while, Heather took her to check her one last time and Cindy gathered some clothes for me and told me I could get dressed in the bathroom. I got up and was still bleeding and made my way to the bathroom. I wanted to take a shower and when I got in the bathroom I started to feel very dizzy and had to sit down. Cindy had Brendon get me some food and water and I sat and ate for a while. I was nervous about the way I was feeling but Cindy reminded me that I had just been thru a 60+ hour labor, hadn’t slept in two nights, threw up everything I had eaten in the last two days and just pushed a 10 pound baby out of me. I remember nodding and saying, “Oh yeah.” LOL After a while I attempted to get in the shower again but had to get out immediately because I almost passed out. They had to give me a shot to help with the bleeding. It took a little while but I started to feel much better.
We were able to go home that night – about 4 hours after I gave birth. It was so nice being at home and getting to sleep in my own bed. Bryce slept for 8 hours straight that first night. I think she knew that Mom really, really needed a good night sleep. She had also gone through quite an ordeal as well. I still woke up every hour to check on her in the co-sleeper right next to me but went right back to sleep. It was emotionally and physically draining for all four of us. When I think back on all the details and as I sit and write this, I can’t believe all the events that took place. I mean, 24 hour labors are supposedly long. I endured about 60 hours of labor with no sleep. I am amazed by what I was able to do. I am amazed by what my husband and my Mom did for me. I am amazed at what Brenna witnessed and that she was okay with it all. I am amazed by the way the nurses and my midwife came together and did what needed to be done to take care of me and my baby. I will be forever grateful to all of them at the birth center for making it such a wonderful experience. And now I am amazed and completely in love with my beautiful, sweet baby Bryce, who we’ve wanted for so long.